The Pool Boy

It's supposed to be a real scorcher this week so I've been gifted a swimming pool.  Yesterday I dove in for the first time.  Well, let's not use as strong as word as "dove."  I was slightly more timid.  I held my mom's hand and arms and didn't want her to put me down.  I wasn't scared- I was skeptical.  As I am with everything.  (Except for anything I find on the floor.  That goes straight into my mouth.)   I wasn't quite sure what I was supposed to do in it.  Is it a bath?  Is it a game?  Is it going to hurt?  Should I be smiling?  Is this fun?  It took a little time but I got the hang of it. 

I splished.  Then I splashed.

After splishing and splashing I devoted some time to the studying of falling water droplets. 
The inertia of h2o when it  is in it's purest form astounds me. 
I made detailed notes and sketches in my Koley Steno Pad.

Did I tell you?  My pool is a Puffer Fish with really silly eyes.

All in all.  I like the pool scene.  The beach vibe is outrageous. The beach volleyball, sunbathing, building sandcastles, checking out bikini babes (my fave), and looking for sea shells.  It's my kind of scene. 

Did I mention my preference for nude beaches?

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

I'm going to be working on revamping my blog over the next couple days.  Giving it a little of my genuine Koley style.  You know, the bold look of Koler.  (I've used that line before.) 
So don't worry about e-mailing me or hitting my up twitter or posting on my Facebook wall or texting on my iPhone that my blog looks wonky.
I know it does.

Just enjoy being part of the process amigos.

Kisses,
Koley

Good Things Come in 3s

When I was just a baby I had to have my mom feed me.  At the time I thought nothing could be better.  Well.  Boy have my eyes been opened!  I stand (while holding onto something) before you a liberated man.  I prefer to feed myself these days.  Take today, for instance.  I fed myself Rice Chex, mozzarella cheese, one half of a baaa-nana, and some stuffing left over from yesterday.  I take my time.  I coast along at a leisurely pace and I savor every bite with Mmmmmms and approving nods and occasionally a little lip licking.  I like to put up a lot of fanfare for my mom.

Speaking of fanfare- I woke up one day and there was a magic carpet in my living room!  Talk about freakin' awesome!  I don't know where it came from (or where it went.... hmmmm....) but I sure loved riding it.

At first I was a leetle beet nervous.

Then I remembered I'm a dare-devil.

... and devilishly handsome.

Lastly, I have lost some weight.  My goal was to be in jeans by summer.  Accomplished!  I am down to 24 pounds.  Mom says I am getting a lot of exercise and I should feel good about it.  But I do think she misses Chubby Koley.  I look at pictures of my "old self" and just cringe!  I was HUGE!  Why didn't anyone tell me?  I'm posting some before and afters.  Let it be known I did this all on my own.  No Weight Watchers no Jenny Craig.  All me!

After.  Notice the distinction that is my neck.  And my pecs.  Defined.

Before.  Too many cheetos and late night TV.

Before.  HA!  The rolls are innumerable.  And my head is so ROUND!

Before.  *Sigh* That holiday weight sticks with ya.

After.  My smile is a little awkward but, in my defense, I knew I was being photographed for an "after" and I was trying to get my body positioned to look it's slimmest.  Baby wants to look fit! 

My Personal Ad

Ladies, I'm an independent man. 
Ruler of the roost.  Big Man on Campus.  Head Hancho.  The Big Cheese.  Boss-man. 
You can call me Captain or Sir if you want.
Because I've come to the realization that there is nothing I can not do.
Let's see...
I feed myself Baby Mums Mums and Teething Crackers like 3 or 4 times a day.
Sometimes I go wild and eat fruit puffs.  Not too many, though, I want to keep up a certain physique. 
I pull myself up to play the piano.  I can reach the white keys and sometimes- if I am on my tippy toes I
can even hit the black ones.
I climb stairs.  Which is great exercise for my heart. (and my mom)
I can turn the TV off and on by just pushing one button.  There's never any shows on though.  It's just a black screen.  I put a complaint in the box... but you know how those boxes are.  They don't ever read the complaints.
I turn the pages to all the books mom reads me.  I determine the pace.  Sometimes we take it slow and mom reads the same page four or five times and then there are times I want to get on with my day and we whiz through books taking them two- sometimes three pages at a time.
I undo my own diaper.  Sometimes it needs changed and sometimes I just want a little fresh air.
I have let my hair grow super long in the back.  Honing in my hippie vibes.  Yeah, it's kinda rebellious. I won't let my mom cut it.  But let me tell you, it is soft hair ma' ladies.  Super soft.
I hold my own wash rag in the tub and, when so inclined, I scrub my body with it.


I open drawers, cupboards, closets, chests, boxes, purses, dishwashers... you name it... I can figure out how to open it and empty it.  Skills, babe.  Skills.
When we are at the playground I go like 20 feet away from mom without even turning around to see if she is still there.  I know.  Wild streak.  Buy me a Harley-I'm ready to bust out of here!

I'm your basic Hunk.
Did I mention I'm a world class snuggler?