I Called The Witch Doctor

Today I went to the doctor and boy did I knock 'em dead.
My stats were on the charts for the first time. 
Weight: 23 pounds 12 ounces (98%)
Height:  28 3/4 inches (92%)
Head:  18 1/4 inches (93%)
They said I am heading towards the curve.  Not sky-rocketing anymore.  Now I am just regular Kole Giant Baby not Kole GIGANTOR Baby Extreme.  You can see I am out of the 99 percentile. In FACT (!) I lost one pound.  I'm still a pudgy boy with rolls, wrinkles, and flubber to spare.  But there is one whole pound less of it now.  I was at 24 pounds 8 oz. and now I'm at 23 pounds 12 oz.  Nothing to sneeze at.  (PS- I don't get that expression.  Am I supposed to sneeze at meager details?  Someone explain this to me before I really enter society.)
My doctor really swooned over me.  He said I had beautifully colored skin.  And it is allllll naturallll baby!  Let see.... what else did he say. (drumming my fingers) He said that I am a fantastic eater and lots of babies wouldn't eat as much as I do.  I eat 1/2 cup of oatmeal and 3.5-4.5 ounces of baby food.  Per sitting.  Mom was worried that she was sending me straight to OverEaters Anonymous- but Dr. Hatch assured her (and I) that I was getting just the right amount.  He said I can guide mom as to how much to feed me.  Did you hear that?  I guide mom.  If I want more?  I just open my mouth and mom is supposed to give me more.  Feels good to be in charge.  Well-(little secret) I've always been in charge it's just nice to have someone verify this.
My doctor also said that I was dealt a bad hand with my sinuses.  It's the stock I was bred from.  It is simply something I must cope with.  And I cope pretty well.  Mom is the one that is always worried.  I do just fine.  It sounds like I am really laboring to breathe- but a little congestion is not a biggie for me.
The shots weren't so bad.  I had the good nurse.  Lori.  She's fast and efficient and gives cool band-aids.  The actual injection doesn't hurt me.  It's one little poke.  I'm MegaBaby and I can handle it.  It's nothing.  I drank their little health elixir got one shot in the left and two on the right. It was nothing. I confess the second shot on the right stung a little.  Okay, it burned.  Alright, alright I screamed so loud the windows were rattling.  I just wasn't expecting it!  Mom was right there- how could something bad happen with mom right there.  I screamed and turned bright red and shot tears out of my eyes as fast as they would come.  Mom picked me up and I was fine.  I did keep a keen eye on Ms. Lori after that.  All smiley and sweet.  Boy was THAT a show.

So I cried a little after my shots.  Whattayagonna do about it?

I don't mind going to good doctor's office at all.  I get to sit around in my diaper and have people coo over me.  The doctor said I am very coordinated for a baby my age. He also said I am very smart and charming, dependable, cooperative, energetic, ambitious, friendly, an over-achiever, most likely to succeed.  Hehehe.  Okay I made up everything after smart.  But come one.  It's true wouldn't you say?  Grampa Poulsen says I'm "Coo-tastic."  I think we all would agree there.